| Kate | |
| *rolls dice* |
| Kate | |
| Nine! Alright...I'll bet that it was Colonel Mustard...in the Conservatory...with...the Lead Pipe! |
| Kate | |
| Bam! Who loves kitty? |
| Bono | |
 | HA! Colonel Mustard can't be the murderer if I have his car now, CAN HE, bitch?! |
| Kate | |
| ...dammit. |
| Kate | |
| *takes off pants* |
| Larry | |
 | *sits in underwear* |
| Lary | |
| *grumblemutter* Who got the wise idea to play strip Clue, anyway? |
| Edge | |
 | It was me, surprisingly. |
| Mama K | |
 | *also clad in skivies* Surprisingly my ass! You know you would stay fully clothed with the rest of us suffered, you bastard! |
| Edge | |
| Genius bastard, you mean. And it is your turn again, Mama K. |
| Mama K | |
| *rolls dice* Ha! Lucky 7! |
| Mama K | |
| I have sufficent evidence that points to Miss Sclaret as the murderer, the rope as the murder weapon, and the Library as the scene of the crime. |
| Adam | |
 | What the fuck are you on about, Mama K? |
| Mama K | |
| Allow my colleagues to explain. |
| Gil Grissom, CSI | |
 | Upon my examination and autopsy of Mr. Boddy's...body, deep bruises were found around his neck and larynx. The autopsy report compiled by the medical examiner confirmed the existance of a broken hyoid bone, and according to the shape and depth of the bruising, logic leads one to determine only a ligature bound tightly around the throat could cause such a distinct pattern of miscoloring. |
| Bono | |
| *whispers* A ligature? |
| Edge | |
| *whispers* The rope, B. |
| Bono | |
| *whisper* Oh, right, got it. |
| Warrick Brown, CSI | |
 | Trace evidence examination also revealed fine hemp fibers around the area of bruising. When these were cross-referenced with fibers from the rope that we have in evidence, they were found to be an exact match in design and production. |
| Gil Grissom, CSI | |
| Hemp fibers of a similar nature were found also on the floor of the library, along with a number of small red cotton fibers, consistant with a gown known to be worn by a certain Mrs. Scarlet. This evidence inexorably links Mr. Body, the rope, Mrs. Scarlet, and the Library. |
| Larry | |
| Well, that was, ehm, educational. |
| Adam | |
| *checks the Confidential File* |
| Adam | |
| Nope, sorry...turns out it was Professor Plum, in the Study, with the candlestick. |
| Gil Grissom, CSI | |
| You're mistaken. It was Mrs. Scarlet, in the Library, with the rope. |
| Adam | |
| Listen, you cheeky bastard, I may not be a rocket scientist, but I can fucking read the cards, alright? You're wrong, and so it is the birthday suit for the lovely Mama K. |
| Mama K | |
| Feck off, Adam! |
| Gil Grissom, CSI | |
| I'M NEVER WRONG! I'M GIL GRISSOM, DAMMIT! I AM THE LEADING CRIMINALIST IN THE COUNTRY! |
| Warrick Brown, CSI | |
| Grissom, calm the fuck down, man! |
| Wrrick Brown, CSI | |
| Sorry, he gets like this when he dosen't sleep much. |
| Gil Grissom, CSI | |
| I WILL SMACK YOU IN THE MOUTH, I'M NEIL DIAMOND! |
| Warrick Brown, CSI | |
| .... |
| Warrick Brown, CSI | |
| ...Okay, Grissom, we're leaving now. Honestly, I can't take you anywhere... |
| Kate | |
| *sexy voice* Are you sure you don't want to stay for a while, baby? |
| Warrick Brown, CSI | |
| *looks around* Well, what is in it for me? |
| Mama K | |
| All the sherbert you can eat and random molestations by members of either sex. |
| Rufus Wainwright | |
 | *winkwink* |
| Warrick Brown, CSI | |
| Hrm... |
| Warrick Brown, CSI | |
| Could be fun. |
| Mama K | |
| Then would you mind lending me your labcoat? |
| MamaK | |
| It's fucking freezing in here when you don't have any clothes on. |