Kate
So, it's Valentine's Day.
Satan
*wears black in protest*
Kate
Satan, you always wear black.
Satan
Yeah, so what? *snaps*
Mama K
Yep, a day where we celebrate the death of a priest who fell in love with a blind girl.
Kate
This is true.
Tania
....huh?
Mama K
St. Valentine was a priest who performed secret marriages for people, and when he was jailed he fell in love with his jailer's daughter, who was blind.
Tania
...but, he was a priest.
Mama K
And he was executed, canonized, decanonized, and now we get all love dovey on February 14th.
Bono
But there's more to Valentine's than that, Mama K.
Mama K
Like what?
Bono
Dirty Valentines.
Edge
Skimpy lingerie.
Keanu Reeves
Chocolate body paint.
Tenoko
Oh my.
Adam
Handcuffs!
Larry
...you mean fuzzy handcuffs?
Adam
Sure, why not?
Larry
*shudder*
Kate
What is it, Larry?
Larry
Nothing...let's just say I've had some, erm, experiences with fuzzy handcuffs.
Adam
Yeah ya did!
Kate

!

Ewan McGregor
There's the softer side of Valentine's...like choclate covered strawberries.
Kate
The Kama Sutra.
Awkward Silence
....
Kate
....what?
Tania
Nothing!
Bono
Just imagining the possibilites.
Larry
Don't forget red satin blindfolds!
Mama K
Now you're talking my language!

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